A Cold Night Out

In case you haven’t read the paper or watched TV lately, Denver has been “dumped on” big time. There have been two major snow storms over the holiday season, so far. It is a beautiful day today, but cold.

The first week was ok, and actually sort of fun. We had stocked up on liquor and food for Christmas, and since Greg’s parents came to stay, it was nice just visiting, cooking food, watching TV, and sleeping of course. All fine for one week. But, I have been more than a little stir crazy though this second blizzard.

The weather finally let up a bit late yesterday. Greg was on a three day trip, with a nice 21 hour layover in Orange County, California. Anyway, here I am stuck by myself. I did some more cleaning, and cooking. Brewed a pot of coffee – drank it all, which wired me up. I played on the computer some, watched TV, and was generally bored.

Lily came over from next door and we played some board games for awhile. We had a good conversation about life, sex, aging, politics, neighbors, and such. We fixed a strong hot toddy, and had a relaxing afternoon. Then Lily left, and I was bored to tears. I was looking out the window, and thinking it would be nice to get out for a while. Ah – a cab – excellent idea. So, I got dressed, called Metro Taxi, and waited – and waited.

The cab finally showed up, and thinking ahead, I had put on a pair of thermal underwear due to the temperature drop, got some cash from Pappas Grocery around the block, and was good to go. I might have guessed it would turn into sort of a strange evening when the cabbie got another call as he turned the cab onto Colfax Avenue. The Cabbie asked politely if we could go back and pick up some more customers just a few blocks from my house. Due to the bad conditions of the road, I said sure, why not. The Cabbie cut me a deal on my cab fare - only charged me five bucks to drop me off at Hamburger Mary’s. I tipped him a couple of bucks, and my jail break had begun.

I scoped Mary's out, and decided to head to JRs instead. It looked as though there was a better crowd of people at JRs. I ordered a Stoli and Tonic, and the free pour on that first drink was stiff to say the least. I wandered around. I didn’t really see anyone I knew. I actually don’t go out much, and with my hearing being so poor, I make a poor conversationalist, but I do make an honest attempt. Faking what you hear in a conversation can sometimes lead to a strange look from your conversation partner when you answer a question with a yes or no, and they ask, “What kind of work do you do?”

So, not seeing anyone i knew or would really want to know, I head down to the Wrangler. I figured my next door neighbors might be headed down there, but wasn’t sure. The holidays are busy times for them at work, and I thought they might be too exhausted to go out. I walk into the Wrangler, and ordered another Stoli and Tonic – and it was another stiff pour. I’m thinking, ok, I’m not driving, I’m on vacation, and I’ve been pent up for two weeks (I know, justifying potentially bad behavior is not the greatest.)

Anyway, the neighbors do arrive. I ran into their circle of friends before they arrived and said hello and made with some light conversation. These guys are much younger than me. I guess I started to feel a bit like the “odd man and old man out” (probably my own paranoia) but didn’t feel too welcome, so I took a seat at the bar. And, another stiff Stoli and Tonic arrived. Since I don’t go out much, sitting in a bar with a pretty good buzz going watching my neighbors have a good time sort of made me feel like an old bar fly – yuk! So, I talked to a couple of people, wandered around, and to my amazement, a guy starts cruising me. That was a real ego booster, considering how sorry I was feeling for myself, and such. He was good looking, and had very beautiful eyes. Not sure how to describe the color, the bar lighting being dark. The loud music was playing, and he was talking into my bad ear, and I only caught bits and pieces of what he was saying. Nonetheless, it was nice to feel attractive.

Sometimes I go from day-to-day, riding the bus to work, stuck in my office all day, gaining weight, and just plain feeling old. So, it was sort of nice to feel attractive – a little flirting and nothing more. So, I am talking about the time I had spent in Dallas working for about six months, and he said he loved it there. Now, Dallas is not exactly a place (in my opinion) where a gay man would want to spend anytime. So, he tells me he spent time in jail there, and I’m like thinking, well, time to exit quickly. Now, remember the streets are filled with snow, so I head east toward JRs to stop and get warm. Then, I’m thinking I will head to Charlie’s, which is about five blocks away.

I wander around JRs, have another Stoli and Tonic (needing plenty of anti-freeze for the trip to Charlie’s.) I walk the five or six blocks to Charlie’s, and no one is there except drag queens, line dancers, and party boys. My strategy was to get to Charlie’s to call for a cab back home due to the bar being right on Colfax. Well, that wasn’t going to happen. The door manager said there was a three hour wait for a cab, if one showed up at all.

Now, I’ve got this serious buzz going on, it is like midnight, and the bar closes at 2 am. And, even with the buzz, I can do the math – it wasn’t gonna happen. So I asked the door manager if the buses were running on Colfax, and she just put her hands up in the air and said, “Who knows.” Then, she took my hand and said, “Good luck honey.” WOW.

So, with this super buzz, I’m thinking the math strategy again – how many blocks to walk in the snow and slush and cold. Well – best guess was about 22 to 25 blocks, with a big buzz, in the slush and cold – but I had my thermal underwear on (thank god for doing some risk management ahead of time.) Thinking about it some more, I remember that Pete’s Kitchen is about 8 blocks away. I’m hungry anyway, so my next strategy is to get to Pete’s as fast as I can. Besides, I’m thinking the jailbird from the Wrangler is eventually going to wind up at Charlie’s, and I don’t want to be there. Off I go.

I stay on Colfax and watch for the bus stops. I pass a couple of them by and wait. But no bus comes by. I see the Pete’s Kitchen marquee ahead of me, and get a big grin on my face. The hookers and dealers are out, even on a cold night and I just want some coffee, a warm place at the counter and a sandwich. My neighbors are periodically text-messaging me asking, “where the fuck R U.”

Pete’s is just one of those places you have to go to after a heavy night of drinking. Anyway, I sat at the counter and ordered that hot cup of coffee and a Philly-Cheese steak sandwich. This is a place you would think Jack Kerouac would have hung at, had he been alive today. I’m watching the short-order cook work his magic on the grill with the potatoes piled in a heap, the bacon stacked high on a warming tray, and the deep fat fryer in front of me cooking up two baskets of fries. There is one of those order carousels in front of the cooks with about 10 green-colored order checks on it. These cooks are amazing. The wheel flies around, and they pull the checks off one by one, slam the plates of food on the counter and yell for the waitress to move it so they can make room for more orders. I’m sitting there drinking my second cup of coffee and staring at the deep fat fryer. There is a waste basket directly under the fryer with a plastic bag in it. The plastic bag has melted onto the side of the fryer, obviously due to the heat.

My order finally arrives. The waitress asks me a question (again in my bad ear), and I say, “Huh,” and twist my head so I can hear her. She asks if I need anything else, and I just said a cab. She smiled and said, "Good luck!" I finished my meal and headed to the rest room before leaving. I waited and waited for my turn. There’s a bunch of pictures on the wall, apparently from local celebrities. There is a big sign on the emergency exit that says, “Entering a trans-fat free zone.” At this point I needed some mild humor, and that did just fine.

Next, I head to the cashier to pay my bill; I left the waitress a two-buck tip. There’s a big and tall cop (probably 6’ 6” that probably weighed in at 240) standing next to the register. I graciously pay my bill and exit into the cold winter night. So, now my head is a bit clearer, I no longer have to pee, I have a full stomach, and I’m doing the math again. Let’s see, originally (from Charlie’s) was probably 20 blocks, and I had walked eight. So, 12 blocks, not too bad. There are some drunks on the other side of the street hollering and laughing, and I am saying to myself – just stay on that side, and I will be just fine. I pick up my pace, and ahead I can see the 7-11 store on the corner of York and Colfax. Now I know I am getting close. It is very cold and hard to walk in the slush. All the while I don’t see one bus even drive by.

I finally arrive at the 7-11 and think about going in to get warm, but this place is notorious for people fighting in the parking lot and homeless folks hanging on the corner begging for change. Ahead of me I see the new Tattered Cover Bookstore, which is right on Elizabeth Street and I say “hurray” to myself – I’m almost home. But, my math did fail me. I forgot about the final three blocks up Elizabeth Street to my house. Oh well, I’m cold and almost home. No more text messages from the neighbors. It is quiet and dark and I am hurrying as fast as I can to get to the door. In short order, I arrive, unlock the door, and our wonderful little Chihuahua is waiting. He needs to pee, so we go out once again in the cold, and he wants to scope out the perfect place to take a dump and pee. With all the snow, that perfect place is nowhere to be found. So, he looks at me, his ears pushed back, positions himself and, well, you can guess the rest.

We hurry back in the house and get in the warm bed. What a night.