If you were a fan of the TV series Sex in the City, you know that the primary character Carrie Bradshaw loved shoes - especially Molano Blanacs (forgive me if I spelled the shoe name wrong - only my rich drag queen friends wear them.) As TV series go, and are constructed I suppose, Carrie and her friends spent several years looking for love, and most of the time in all the wrong places. Ultimately, Carrie married the one true love of her life, Mr. Big, who was there from the beginning.
A discussion of love also involves the concept of loving unconditionally. You cannot love someone or something with reservation or condition - this simply is not love. Now, that is not to say that you or I have to put up with the crap that our loved ones dish out (and we dish as well). It may very well be that you love someone unconditionally, but just can't live with that person. Quite frankly, I still don't understand how Mr. Big could ever live with Carrie Bradshaw (I certainly couldn't.)
In my own relationship, I often times take for granted the loving things that are done for me. And, rather than focus on those little wonders, I get caught up in the teasing, bickering, and the he said/he said battles. Then, I step back and see the vunerable side of this person I am with and realize that there is a complete, sensitive, attractive, and inherently good person I am looking at. When we sink to the level of objectifying our loved one, it is time for either counseling or attornies. At this point, an emotional divorce is already in full swing.
Some people are not cut out for long term relationships or just can't live with someone else. I had a friend who was with his partner for almost 20 years - but they lived in separate houses. When they finally moved in together, they broke off their relationship within 9 months! It is OK to be single - sometimes it is just better that way.
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